Someone please try this experiment:
Go to Subway. Every day of the week they have a different value meal. Last Saturday it was “Roast Beef Day”. I calculated that a roast beef 6 inch value meal would be cheaper than a 6 Inch Veggie Sub. So I explained to the friendly “sandwich artist” that I would like to have the Roast Beef Value meal but without meat. I even explained to her why I am doing this: to save about 10 cents.
I am not a very frugal person, but I am a huge proponent of ethically “hacking” menus to give myself an advantage, even if it is a very small economical one. I mainly do this so I can tell my friends and strengthen the argument that I am intellectually superior to them. Note to self: Write a post about the Olive Garden Appetizer Sampler Hack.
After attempting to order this modified roast beef sandwich, the artist told me that she can’t do that. I know that it was mainly due to confusion because there was a bit of a language barrier and I’m sure that what I attempted to do was not a very common practice. She didn’t really explain why I was being denied and I didn’t ask for an explanation. So I decided to just order the “6 inch Veggie Sub Combo” unhacked. I think she felt bad for denying me and she made the veggie sub extra delicious. Or maybe these are just my defense mechanisms playing tricks on me.
In the future I will continue to order the veggie sub combo in the traditional way. For example, I will say: “* “Hello! I would like a 6 inch veggie sub on wheat bread.” I calculate that I probably will not order this menu item from Subway more than 30 times in the rest of my life mainly because I am not a vegetarian and I prefer Quiznos to Subway. The decision to practice my future subway dining experiences this way will not really cost me more than $3.00 (without factoring in inflation or the elimination of the daily value meal).
My only regret is that to this day I do not know if I was denied the modified roast beef combo order because of confusion or simple corporate policy. I bet you can see where I am going with this: a little conspiracy theory for you. Keep in mind I am just putting this out there and you heard it from me first if it is true. The Subway corporation is anti vegetarian!? Is it possible? You be the judge.
I understand that when the sandwich artists or other employees do inventory and compare it to the sales record, the modified roast beef (minus the beef = veggie) will cause a slight problem. They will have an additional two or three ounces of roast beef and according to the register this extra meat should have been sold. The management might think that their subway artists are pulling a fast one on people and not giving the customers an adequate meat per sandwich ratio. It makes perfect sense for the manager to assume their employees are skimming off the top at the customer’s expense when they see this imbalance . But then again you can probably see the logical problem here: Roast beef usually comes in some force of a slice. So it’s not like a “gradual” under-serving of meat, but a one time attack on a specific customer. Or more realistically, for every 40 or so customers, the sandwich artist decides to give them a reduced amount of roast beef. So what I am saying is that maybe the “you only get a veggie sub if you pay for it” policy is to prevent such confusion in book keeping or inventory. Again, I am just trying to put myself in the eyes of upper management. I am trying to figure out why the Subway corporation might have a motive to discourage the practice of modifying meat orders into vegetarian orders.
It pains me to think of this, and I hope that it is not true: It is quite possible that Subway like many fast food chains simply hate animals. Perhaps Subway doesn’t want animal rights activists inside their doors and they assume that the majority of vegetarians are . Perhaps the powers that be in the Subway corporation were attacked by a group of cows and turkeys and this is their way to get revenge. This theory is slightly flawed however. Remember when Jarod S. Fogle was emerging as the poster-boy for Subway? Subway explained what his diet consisted of. He would eat a 6 inch sub of turkey or some other lean meat for lunch with a bag of reduced fat chips. Then he would eat a foot long veggie sub for dinner. So if they are really anti-vegetarian they probably would keep the lid on his choice of dinner. Or then again, maybe the Subway corporation had no choice to reveal this because they didn’t trust Jarod’s ability to keep this secret.
There are many theories out there and I am sure that you the reader have your own. Feel free to share with me any Subway experiences that you encounter relating to vegetarian menu item ordering only. In the mean time, please try ordering a Subway “Daily value meal minus the meat” if you haven’t done so already. If you find yourself successful please let me know. I will return the favor by allowing you to keep 100% of the money you saved instead of rightfully accepting a percentage of your savings.
